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Such promiscuous disclosure is not without its dangers, however. If you make yourself too familiar, your once-adoring public, ever-fickle, will get bored; they'll search for someone new to fixate on. Luckily, there are many strategies you can employ to retain a sense of mystery. Siegel opts for the "mixed signals" approach. On the one hand, he repeatedly yearns for that mythical Swiss woman who will rescue him from lonely nights of superfluous "Doritos" production. On the other hand, you have to wonder: can a never-married, Marilyn Monroe-obsessed, Judy Garland-loving, 36 year-old designer of such fussy typefaces as Tekton and Eaglefeather, with a penchant for fancy slacks, possibly be straight?

In addition to the sexual-orientation intrigue, there's the general strangeness of Siegel's fixation on menstruation, breast-feeding, and conception. Sure, at age 36, he's yearning to be a dad, but he takes it a few long steps past normal paternal curiosity. Consider the following excerpts:

"So can I ask you something? Are these new curved tampons from Kotex really any better? I always thought OBs seemed like the best choice, but I'm willing to learn something here if you can give me the real scoop."

"Meanwhile, men unfailingly manufacture a thousand sperm cells every minute, like they were just baking Doritos at the factory. ("Suck all you want, honey, I'll make more.)"

"Women think I'm weird because on the first date I ask if they'd be willing to breast-feed for two years."

"I'm dying to know if those new curved tampons from Kotex work better or not. I'd appreciate hearing from some users...Aren't OB better, anyway, or am I out of touch in the feminine hygiene department?"

Ummm. Maybe just out of touch in general...

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